5 Ways to Tell if You Need a Theme Song

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Copyright Cas Blomberg

At the dinner table this past weekend, my son asked why Robin didn’t have a theme song. After a short discussion, he proceeded to steal Batman’s song and give it to Robin. Hey, why not? Everyone should have a theme song, right? It’s high time equality showed up for the sidekicks in our culture. Why Robin never had his own song before is a mystery, but he’s got one now. Go Robin!

Then I started thinking. It’s not just Robin who’s missing his own theme song. Most of us could use one, too. Don’t believe me? I’ve put together a short list of theme song qualifications to eliminate any future confusion about theme-song worthiness. 

1) Are tights and a cape part of your daily wardrobe? Have you been known to fly? Do you always seem to show up at crime scenes before the cops–and the villains? Do you have metal blades that pop out of your knuckles? At any time in your past have you flown a nuclear bomb into outer space to save Earth? Do you frequently perform any act of kindness and (or) toss bread crumbs to stray animals? Have you ever been a friend to someone? In short, are you a superhero?

2) Are you a one-armed knight with a trusty steed, a champion axe thrower without an axe riding a turtle, or a skeleton walking around on the back of a gator with bones so discolored people keep leaving bottles of bleach by your grave? The question here is do you typically overcome challenges and have a mount (tractors count)? I guess the mount isn’t that important (but it is interesting, especially if it’s a gator).

3) Are you a fire-breathing dragon, a manic-depressive mermaid, part of an alien race fixated on ruling the universe with strings of bubble gum or the guy named Bob that keeps throwing out his advertisements for sporting goods in the building lobby? In other words, is there something special about you? Eating a hot wing in one bite? Painting your fingernails with your toes? Shooting webs out of your eyes? The ability to see what’s going with your children behind your back?

4) Are you a parent, grandparent, son, daughter, teenager, or a child? I need say no more.

5) Are you none of the above (it could happen . . . somehow . . . with alien technology), some of the above, all of the above and/or generally fall within the ‘Awesome’ category at least once a week?

If you answered, ‘Yes! Yes, that’s me!’ to any of the above (especially that bit about the skeletons), congratulations! You deserve your own theme song.

Go forth and find it!

Or create it.

Then memorize it.

Finally, sing it everywhere you go. Every day. Because sometimes we get caught up washing too many dishes. Or running seventeen errands before rushing home to our frantic and noisy house. Or worrying about what could have been. Or complaining about what we cannot change. Or courting guilt we should have let go years, days and yes, even moments ago. Or wrapping our failures around us like a warm blanket and refusing to toss them aside.

Sometimes we need to be reminded that we are always a superhero to someone, even if that someone is ourselves. Or the cat. Or dog. Or snake. You get the idea.

Go! Find your theme song . . . and sing.

Published by casblomberg

Cas Blomberg is a native-English speaking writer who lives in Stockholm, Sweden.